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July 17, 2012

Backing Vocals for Your Next Shower Recital

Bueller?Everyone knows your voice sounds a hundred times better in the shower than it does anywhere else. It’s the acoustics, right?

Contrary to popular belief, stepping into the shower does not magically transform you into an opera singer, Mariah Carey, or a one-man barber shop quartet.

There are few things worse than hearing someone who can’t sing belt out their rendition of “My Heart Will Go On” in the shower. Lucky for you, I’ve compiled a comprehensive list of these things. Behold:

  • Getting shit on by a pigeon
  • Getting dive-bombed by a pigeon
  • Sitting on a dead bee that has been meticulously placed on your chair, stinger up
  • Impaling yourself in the groin on a subway turnstile
  • Nickelback

Studies show that there’s a lower chance of driving your flatmate to murder if that song you’re singing is actually playing (and louder than your own voice, preferably). But as your friendly resident IT guy, I strongly advise against bringing electronic devices into the shower with you, for water and electricity a good pairing do not make.

Presenting Your Waterproof Solution

Hipe Waterproof Bluetooth Stereo Shower SpeakerAfter a few months of searching for something that would let me listen to my MP3’s in the shower, I happened upon this clever little device on Amazon: The Hipe Waterproof Bluetooth Stereo Shower Speaker (tonight’s homework assignment is saying that five times really fast).

What I was searching for was, essentially, a waterproof MP3 player with a built-in speaker. I envisioned loading it up with a bunch of my favourite songs, taking it into the shower, and getting jiggy with it behind the shower curtain. And now, much to my flatmate’s chagrin, I can.

What is it?

The Hipe Waterproof Bluetooth Stereo Shower Speaker (quite a mouthful, I know) functions as a bluetooth headset. You pair it with your phone (or any bluetooth-enabled media player), and then play music to it wirelessly. Buttons on the front give you play, pause, next/previous, and volume controls. No headphones required.

It also has phone controls for making and answering calls. Nothing tells your clients how important their business is to you like answering their calls while you’re lathering up in the shower!

What is it not?

The Hipe (I’m sorry, but I’m not typing out the whole title again) is not an AM/FM radio, unless you have it connected to one via bluetooth. It’s also not an MP3 player, so you can’t actually store music on it.

It also isn’t completely waterproof. I’d call it water resistant, as it can withstand a stream of water (even a high-pressure water jet), but they don’t recommend completely immersing it. So don’t throw it in the pool.

Does it work?

Hang the Hipe from a shower head or curtain rodIt works perfectly. In fact, I just had a one-person dance party in the shower to test it, and even made a call while doing so. The playback controls work well, and it has good bluetooth range.

The unit feels solid and well-built. The sound quality of the stereo speakers is surprisingly good, and sounds great in the shower. Even the bass is good for its size.

The only warning I’d offer would be that the hook from which you’d hang it from your shower head or curtain rod could be stronger. As such, I’d prefer to set it down on a flat surface. But considering its other strengths, that really doesn’t seem like a very big deal.

Buy One Now

Is it worth $70? That depends on how badly you want to jam in the shower. I wanted it bad, and I don’t regret the purchase. Also, keep in mind you can take this thing anywhere, so it doesn’t have to stay in your bathroom. It’s battery-powered, and charges via USB cable.

Looks like I’ll be taking longer showers from now on. And if you hear running water the next time you call me, now you know why. Try not to get too excited.

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