Today’s To-Do List
I found these on the internet. I didn’t come up with them; Although, I wish I had. You see, I’m as clever as a fox. Just one fox, though. Whoever came up with these is as clever as a whole squadron of foxes.
Hive? Murder? Flock? What, exactly, is the correct term for multiple foxes, anyway?
Check It Off
- Wear a t-shirt that says, “Life.” Hand out lemons on a street corner.
- Hire two private investigators, and get them to follow each other.
- Major in philosophy. Ask people why they would like fries with that.
- Go into a crowded elevator and say, “I bet you’re all wondering why I gathered you here,” with a straight face.
- Make vanilla pudding, put it in a mayonnaise jar, and eat it in public.
- Become a teacher. Make a test where every answer is “C.” Enjoy the show.
- Wait until someone is about to sneeze. Right before they do, loudly scream, “Pika… PIKAAA!”
- Run into a store and ask what year it is. When someone answers, yell, “It worked!” and run out cheering.
- Buy a horse, name it “Oscar Takes the Lead,” and enter it in some horse races.
- Invite someone into your office, turn around in your office chair, and say, “I’ve been expecting you…”
- Change your name to Simon. Start speaking in the third person.
- Become a doctor. Change your last name to Acula.
- Buy a parrot. Teach him to say, “Help! I’ve been turned into a parrot!”
- Follow joggers around in a car, blasting “Eye of the Tiger” for encouragement.